Humorous Quotes

You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover’s arms can only come later when you’re sure they won’t laugh if you trip. - Jonathan Carroll

There is nothing more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends. - Homer

Appearances are deceitful, I know, but so long as they are, there's nothing like having them deceive for us instead of against us. - George Horace Lorimer

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is the fact that it has never tried to contact us. - Unknown

I hate to shop. I consider it one of life's necessary evils, like Brussel sprouts and high-heeled shoes. - Laurel K. Hamilton

You could say anything you wanted to someone you thought you were never going to see again. - Cassandra Clare

Slap-stick comedy is really funny, unless you’re the one getting slapped with the stick. - Carroll Bryant

It’s all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it’s a new game; hide and seek. - Unknown

If people never did silly things nothing intelligent would ever get done. - Ludwig Wittgenstein

Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong. - Oscar Wilde

The reason men lie is because women ask so many questions. - Unknown

I play golf religiously. If I make a shot ... it's a miracle! - Tom Wilson

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